Tuesday, December 2, 2014

My Birthright, My Wonderful Life



Quote:   We're born with success. It is only others who point out our failures, and what they attribute to us as failure. -- Whoopi Goldberg

Perspective:  I used to think pessimists had the best outlook.  If you’re a pessimist, you’re never disappointed.  If you’re a pessimist your negative thoughts and the other negative thinkers you hang around are always right.  But what a way to live. 

What does success mean?  What does failure mean? 

Dictionary definition:
  • Success:  the favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors; the accomplishment of one's goals. 
  • Failure: nonperformance of something due, required, or expected
I started to think of my definition for success.  I also started to think of my definition of failure.

My definition:
  • Success: staying stuck and not trying, not learning from a plan/course of action.
  • Failure: remorse and regret from not trying
Have you heard these type of negative questions/comments previously?
  • Is that coaching thing working out? 
  • When are you going to get a real job? 
  • If you weren’t so picky, you wouldn’t be single.
  • When you relax, you’ll have XXXXXX.
I need to be aware of the fact that my definition of success and failure is vastly different from my family, friends, social media acquaintances, strangers, etc. 

I am a different person than people in my inner circle.  It’s great I’m the product of my background.  It’s great my past history is part of me.  It’s great my past is not the only part. 

It’s great I blaze my own trail.  When I travel on a road not traveled upon, I need to pay attention.  When I know I need to pay attention, outside comments distract me. 

Thank you to everyone for sharing your thoughts.  Now I’m moving forward and it’s a different path than you.  That’s great for me. 


Call to Action:  You are the reigning ruler of a nation.  What comes naturally to you?  How to do bestow “good things” on the people in your nation?  How do you allow others to bestow good things for yourself?  What is your coat of arms?

Coming up#smallchangesarehuge -- group coaching Wednesdays (biweekly) at 8 PM ET   >>  Small Changes are HUGE! Google hangout on Dec 3, 2014

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Influence vs Suggestion



Quote:   We become that which has influenced us the most.  – Wilfred Peterson



Perspective:  I got a little arrogant when I read this quote.  I proudly hailed I am my own person – no reality TV show nor a soap opera nor a political party no social media influence me!  HA!!

Whenever I get that bombastic, I look for humility.  When I couldn’t find any humility, I looked up influence in the dictionary.  One definition is: 

The action or process of producing effects on the actions, behavior, opinions, etc., of another or others. 

 What has influenced me has changed over my adulthood.  Media, college, friends, family when I was in my 20s.  My husband (now my ex-husband), colleagues, family, friends, job, my manager in my 30s.  It took until I was 40+ to realize God (HP, the guy upstairs, etc) influences everything I do.  God is my foundation for everything.  My belief in God balances me, helps me show love to others, and has increased my faith.  

In coaching, we ask, “What is your ‘come from’ place”?  Is your ‘come from’ place:  jealousy, greed, procrastination, or fear?  Is your ‘come from’ place:  faith, love, being grateful, happiness, or generosity?  

Those “positive” characteristics are tough for me.  I’m a pessimist.  I’m used to looking on the dark side BEFORE the bright side.  Is it possible I could turn my thinking around 360 degrees?  What if it WAS possible?  What if it IS possible?  It is … I can … it does.  

Now my influence is strong and motivating and progressing me forward.  Thank you HP!!


Call to Action:  What is the craziest thing you’ve ever done?  Get a full back tattoo?  Skydive from 5,000 feet?  Tell your partner you love them?  What was your thinking process before, during, immediately afterward?  Relive those moments before, during, and immediately afterward.  Now how do you feel?  What’s the next “crazy” thing you’re going to do???!?!?!    


Next Vlog and Google Hangout:  click the link below (or copy/paste in to your browser) for the invite to the next Vlog on Monday September 22 at 830 PM ET:  Spirit with a Bite Sept 22 Vlog 

Thursday, August 14, 2014

Please Yourself First -- Monthly Spirit VLOG

Quote:   I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. – Bill Cosby



Call to Action:  Sing out loud: I am woman – Helen Reddy,  Roar -- Katy Perry, This is a Man’s World – James Brown.  What other song can you think of to help remember the POWER you already have?  



notes:  Spirituality with a Bite is now a book:  http://www.amazon.com/Month-Spirituality-Bite-Crystal-Williamson/dp/1304909611/
 





Wednesday, May 7, 2014

The Undiscovered Country - REDUX



Quote:  Never limit yourself because of others' limited imagination; never limit others because of your own limited imagination. - Mae Jemison 

Waikiki Beach (Hawaii) at sunset
Perspective:  I have a fear of airplane travel.  I do travel.  I’ve been to 16 states in the US (including Hawaii; see pix above), Canada, and the Caribbean.  All via airplane.  My mother is even more fearful of flying than me.  She hasn’t traveled by plane since the 1970s.  When I travel, she prays for me – constantly.  Yes, I’m grateful.  Unfortunately, she panics until I call her when I de-plane. 

My grandmother’s phobia was more acute!!  She was born in the West Indies.  When she was a toddler, she witnessed a volcanic eruption.  Even though the family was able to flee to a nearby island, she never forgot the smell and the horror.  This scarred her.  She often spoke of air travel negatively and rarely traveled. 

When I was a teenager, I didn’t want to be ANYTHING like either one of them. 

My grandmother moved from the West Indies to NYC in the 1910s.  Newly married and pregnant, she was able to run a house, a farm, and few of my grandfather’s businesses.  Over the course of the next 55 years, she was able to raise 7 children and one grandchild in the suburbs of NYC.  No small feat!!!  I can imagine how my mother and her siblings (my aunts and uncles) may have given her challenges.  She was a lovely, quiet, dynamic woman.  She passed away in 1969.

My mother was the first girl in the family to graduate from high school AND attend a higher institution (secretary school).  My mother worked as a secretary in several jobs from the 1950s until she retired in the 1990s.  She raised two crazy children (my brother and I), kept 3 different homes afloat, volunteered in church, and nursed my father until he died in 2005.  My mother is 86 years old. 

I’ve changed my mind; I want to be JUST LIKE THEM!!! 

Call to Action:  You’re standing on a precipice of the Grand Canyon.  Take a deep deep breath.  What is possible now?  

(happy birthday grandma!!)   



#crystalsynergy 

Monday, May 5, 2014

Fly like An Eagle - Let My Spirit Carry Me - REDUX



Quote:  As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down. So it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might. – Marian Anderson



Perspective:  I’ve had a few romantic relationships end bitterly.  It was easy to be acrimonious to ALL men, to blame him, to castigate him.  It was easy to live my life in his hands.  When I do that, I place responsibility AND control for my life with him.  Then (in my mind) he dictates what I eat, what films I watch, what work I do, how I connect with my friends, and how I treat myself!  Now my life was easy, right?  Do I really want that??!?! 



I don’t want anyone to be responsible for me (like a child/parent situation) or be in control of my life.  I want to control my own life.   

I realize control is impossible the moment it’s suggested.  I have power – not control.  I have power over my reactions to situations NOT the situation.  Now I ask myself – what part do I play in this situation?  What was my role in the relationship with him?  What is my role in my relationship with myself?  Now I can turn it over.  Then the solution becomes apparent.



Call to Action:   Write down 136 of your own attributes.  What are the top 10?  What are the last 10?