Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Quote: My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can. -- Cary Grant
Perspective: My life is not simple!! Actually it is – I’m the one that complicates my life!!! For example, how do I travel to my mother’s home during the holidays? My thought process: I should rent a car to bring over my food and groceries. If I rent a car, which location is better? The one garage that’s 7 blocks away but the sidewalks are in disrepair and treacherous to walk upon. The other garage is about a mile away. I must take the bus to travel to the car rental location. Also one garage has intricate security with a long line for initial entry (wait for the attendant, sign my name, show my ID, et al) while the other is outside but there’s little direction to find my rented car.
I have headache already!!
How can I simply occupy my day? If I come from a place of love and joy it helps me. “What can I do that is joyful for all?” Smile, compliment someone on their attire, know that everything will work well. If it’s some task that’s mundane or arduous, I use faith coupled with love to get through. Not around or under or over but through. It’s the only way I learn and know the next time this occurs, BECAUSE IT WILL!!!
By the way, I will take a taxi to my mother’s house during the holiday. At least I think I will …
Call to Action: [pick one question] Ask yourself, what would Cary Grant do in this moment? Ask yourself, what would Detective John Shaft do in this moment? Ask yourself, what would Halle Berry do in this moment? Ask yourself, what would Channing Tatum do in this moment? Ask yourself, what would Scarlett Johansson do in this moment?
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Quote: Killer Joe / Don't you go
Hurt me slow / Please Joe
Cool Joe / Mean Joe / Killer Joe
refrain of song: Killer Joe by Quincy Jones
Perspective: Synonyms can be extremely powerful. Green can indicate someone who is a novice, the color, money, or an environmentally sound structure. Yes it depends on the structure of the sentence, my inflection, and/or what I want to convey to the audience but what else is there?
If I’m speaking to someone I respect or in authority, I will weigh my words carefully. If I’m writing an email to a prospective employer, I may utilize the thesaurus 40 times before sending. How do I contemplate those words when I speak of myself or my future?
If I’m dyslexic do I feel “I will never get this right. Why bother?” If I’m a convicted felon, do I never go on a job interviews because I know they won’t hire me? If I’m a plus size woman, do I think I won’t look great in a bathing suit? Have I stopped myself even before I started???!?!!
Skilled people were not born with their skills. I’m sure Albert Einstein, Eleanor Roosevelt, and Dr Martin Luther King had days when they were “off” or didn’t want to lead. But there was something inside them that forged each of them forward. What is your passion you need – yes need (!!!) – to share with the world? If you have a passion or something you want to share there MUST be someone in the world who wants to hear you. It’s the law of polarity. Everything is dual or has its pair of opposites or two extremes of the same thing. For example, hot and cold may be opposites at first glance, but they just varying degrees of temperature. If you have something to give to others there are OTHERS who want to receive it.
There are two sides to everything. What’s on the opposite side of that fear? Faith … or something else?
FYI >> Albert Einstein was dyslexic. Eleanor Roosevelt was a plus size woman. Dr M L King was a convicted felon. Crystal Williamson is dyslexic too!!
Call to Action: Be a killer today!! Kill that presentation!! Kill that sales pitch!! No one can stop you!!!
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Quote: Happiness has nothing to do with your life's circumstances; it’s based on your ability to accept the things you are experiencing. – Nishan Panwar
Perspective: My level of acceptance depends on my happiness at that moment. Have I eaten a meal? Do I need to go to the bathroom? Am I waiting for a NYC bus in January?
Or does my level of happiness depend on my acceptance in that moment? Can I network (or commiserate or just chat) with others after my meal or while waiting for the bus? What is possible if I’m open?
Yes even if I have to pee … something incredible is possible!!
Accepting is a knowing that whatever comes, I will get through with flying colors. It’s about bending and being ready for whatever comes my way.
Have you ever been fired or laid off? Was your next job more amazing than the previous one? Or did you start a business that changed the world? Or just changed YOUR world and YOUR way of thinking?
When my father died, I realized my mother was my only living parent. Previous to that, my relationship with her was fractured. We had little in common. Did I really want to hang out with her without Dad?!?!!!??
One Thanksgiving we were watching a comedy film on TV together. It was also one of my father’s favorite films of all time. Previous to that, I didn't remember Mom EVER enjoying this film. In fact, I remember her saying it was vulgar. Now she was laughing so loud and long, she told me her stomach hurt. In the past, I remember my father loving this comedy and he would laugh so loud and long his stomach would hurt. My father was there with us watching.
That’s the day that changed us both. We started to talk. Our journey to friendship and hilarity grows every day.
By the way, Mom is 85. Yes she’s still a pistol!!
Thank you Mom for showing me acceptance!
PS >> Yes, I have thanked her in person.
Call to Action: What do I continuously justify in my life today? How am I feeling my way is the only way? What can I turn over and become free of resentment or remorse or guilt? Can I hear another point of view?
Tuesday, November 19, 2013
Quote: "I’m bored" is a useless thing to say. I mean, you live in a great, big, vast world that you’ve seen none percent of. Even the inside of your own mind is endless; it goes on forever, inwardly, do you understand? The fact that you’re alive is amazing, so you don’t get to say "I’m bored". – Louis CK
Perspective: Has your morning been so crazed that you put your underwear on backwards? Have you been so overwhelmed that you forget your keys? Do you look at your children and call them by the wrong name? Then suddenly your “day” comes to an abrupt halt and changes dramatically to pleasant. What happened??!?!?!
<<OR DID THIS HAPPEN>>
Has your morning been orderly, leisurely, and (actually) pleasant? Have your children awakened early, had breakfast, and been ready for school on time? Do you breeze through traffic to arrive at work and your crazy co-worker is on vacation? Then suddenly your “day” comes to an abrupt halt and changes to catastrophic. What happened??!?!?!
I’ve had friends, clients, even strangers wonder how they can put more pep in their life. I often say – are you serious?????!?!?! Life is NEVER dull!! If I come from the perspective of my life is full of joy and mystery and revelations and learning experiences all the time, I will never be bored for long!!
Call to Action: Let’s catapult you to Oct 2015. Write your bio on everything that has happened in your life from today to Oct 2015. Print it. Read it out loud to a friend. Enjoy!!
Notes: LIKE us on Facebook for special offers: https://www.facebook.com/coachingwithcrystalfanpage
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Quote: Whining is anger being forced through a very small hole. – Unknown
Perspective: Have you ever accidentally scraped your nails on a blackboard? Just thinking about it makes me quiver! What did you do immediately after scraping your nails? Apologize profusely? Curse loudly? Shrug it off?
How often do you whine? Be truthful. A synonym of whining is complaining. How often do you complain? I’m from New York City – I’m a professional complainer. The answer for me is too often!
Complaining often becomes toxic. Too much toxicity in our spirit (soul) brings harm. Our spirit is our foundation. A shaky or non-existent foundation will make an entire edifice crumble. This is similar to our spirit. A toxic spirit has a breaking point. That’s when the body is at risk. The body can go on for a while with toxicity. How long can the spirit live with toxicity?
Whining and complaining is often about control, impatience, or resentments. What can I control in this moment? Am I asking God to grant me patience right now?? Do I want to "shoot the messenger" because I have a grudge?
Instead of whining, take a moment to breathe (pray, meditate). Simple but difficult! What can I do in this moment? I can assess my control of the situation, evaluate my current level of patience, or consider my resentment level. Simple solutions can still be a process ... a long process. A process is a journey worth the wait.
Call to Action: We all have assets and liabilities. How did you have a liability removed from your life? Is that liability gone forever or removed in the here and now? Remember your assets. Concentrate on those assets.
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Quote: Fires can't be made with dead embers, nor can enthusiasm be stirred by spiritless men. Enthusiasm in our daily work lightens effort and turns even labor into pleasant tasks. -- James Baldwin
Perspective: When I was in college I worked as a salaried, 25 cents over minimum wage, worker. Although if you asked me back then, I was a professional stylist who thrived at an upscale merchant on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. What??!!! Yes that was me!! I was so happy to have an adult job!!! I wasn’t a camp counselor or babysitter. I had to wear suits and pantyhose and high heels like any other career women. I was crossing the threshold to be an adult.
I was the quintessential, perky worker. I didn’t just sell to customers – I collaborated with clients. I consistently got great reviews of my work and was soooooooooo cheerful! Yes me, the pessimistic South Bronx girl loved loved this job!! Then reality set in. I actually started looking at my payroll checks and how they weren’t getting any larger. I got so depressed. Within 18 months my department went from one of the best on the floor to the next to last in sales. I despised the commute, my co-workers, and yes especially the customers.
How did they inject vigor in to me? They consistently threatened to fire me. I got better for a month, then I went right back to my malaise and apathy. I quit before my 3rd year anniversary and before another dreaded holiday season.
James Baldwin’s quote talks about enthusiasm in my daily work. Not just the 9-5 drudgery but in the run of the mill, mundane, routine type tasks. I’m washing the dishes, changing diapers, reading email, buying gas, or drinking water with little fervor. How happy and grateful can I be to have a roof over my head, have children, have a computer/smartphone, have a car, or have running clean water? How happy and grateful can I be to have integrity, intelligence, wit, beauty, and intimacy with God?
Call to Action: You’ve just finished a triathlon (2 mile swim, 100 mile bicycle ride, 26,2 mile marathon run) in record time. What are you grateful for right now?